fil-ter

Before going out with my girlfriend I was kind of obsessed with her. I took pictures I had of her and scanned them into a japanese program that creates a 3d model of her which you can then ummmm… have your way with. Ahem.

I made about 50 different videos with this software, most of them were of her making love and performing oral sex on a 3d model of myself, and sometimes multiple versions of me. Others involved machines….you get the idea.

I eventually worked up the courage to talk to her and we ended up hitting it off and are now a couple, the problem is that she used my computer and ended up finding the vids even though they were buried inside multiple folders. Of course she was pretty freaked out, especially since the titles of the vids were needlessly crude on my part. She said she had to leave and needs some time alone.

Good to see technology enabling new levels of creepiness for lonely guys everywhere.

I am a female in my mid 60’s and I am looking for a room mate. Times are tight and I need some extra money. I am willing to rent out my bathroom in my 1 bedroom east village home.

My bathroom is large. You can easily put a twin air mattress in there. I only ask that when I need to use the bathroom, you or your air mattress are not in it.

I do ask that when you are in the apartment, you confine yourself to the bathroom. I do not feel comfortable with a stranger walking around my living room. This might change as I get to know you better.

You may have guest over as long as they are cnfined to the bathroom as well. This might seem a bit odd but please remember the rent is $400 and the bathroom is large.

(via reddit)

[The Murder Trust] plotted to take out three life insurance policies on Malloy, and then get him to drink himself to death. The first part of the plot was successful, and (probably with the aid of a corrupt insurance agent) they stood to gain over $3,500 (almost $57,000 by 2008’s standards by the CPI) if Malloy died an accidental death.

Marino owned a speakeasy, and gave Malloy unlimited credit, thinking it would soon put an end to him. Although Malloy drank for a majority of his waking day, which would kill an average man, it did not. To remedy this, Antifreeze, a deadly poison, was substituted for liquor, but still Malloy would drink until he passed out, wake up, and come back for more. Antifreeze was substituted with turpentine, followed by horse liniment, and finally mixed in rat poison.[1] Still, Malloy lived. The gang began to get creative, thinking raw oysters soaked in wood alcohol would do the trick … Then came a sandwich of spoiled sardines, carpet tacks, and metal shavings.

(via reddit)

If you have tent caterpillars in your cherry trees, the tents and crawly worms are enough for some folks. Taking the “yuck factor” even further, though, is the person who decided to make tent caterpillar wine.

Infestations are pretty insane. (via reddit)

Zak, Long Island, New York I am rational, integrated, and efficacious. So far, I’ve never met a person who lives up to the standard I hold for myself (except online).

I take my relationships seriously. I am simply not attracted to many of the women in this world. I do not “hook-up” with girls. I only kiss those who deserve, and so far I have only encountered one who did. I would love to find someone I can learn something from; someone who challenges me to think; someone I can feel like I’ve won, rather than lowered myself to.

I’d never heard of these — here’s Ellen doing it too.