Underfunded Scientists Force Lipstick-Covered Rat With Cancer To Run Through Maze
Scientists at the severely underfunded HLM Research Laboratories announced plans Monday to have the facility’s one remaining rat, Mendel, now cancer-ridden and covered in lipstick, run through a maze several hundred times.
Head researcher Dr. Linda Cho said that since the lab’s $5.6 million budget was slashed by 90 percent last winter, Mendel, a blind 1-year-old albino Norwegian rat with advanced non-Hodgkin’s lymphoma, has served as the subject for every experiment the lab has performed.
